Fiction Fragment Friday

This week is a random idea that popped into my head. Another new way of presenting a story. I didn’t plan it out at all. I approached each room and decided what they would be like as they came up. Not really much to talk about with this story. Hope you enjoy.

                So, I know the last house wasn’t quite what you were looking for, but I really think you’re going to love this one.  As you can see the yard is very large.  What’s that?  Oh, don’t worry about those burnt spots.  I assure you the fires were all outside and there was no damage to the actual property.  The previous owners got a bit rowdy at times.  Once this place is yours though I’m sure your new neighbors will be so happy to have such an upstanding individual as yourself move in.  You are a quiet neighbor, right? 

                As you can see the front door is an antique.  That skull door knocker is made of real gold.  I would suggest replacing it though.  Sometimes with antiques they don’t quite meet modern safety standards.  The first time I viewed this place I cut my hand on it.  I’m not sure where the metal sliver is, but I got blood all over those very detailed fangs.  If you put an offer down, I can request that replacing the door, be a requirement for closing.  Wouldn’t want you to have to worry about that after all.

                Take a look at this beautiful entryway.  Living room on the right, dining room on the left, kitchen down the hall, and stairway up to the second level.  Where should we start?  Let’s take a look at the living room first.  Just imagine sitting in a comfy recliner with a good book in front of the magnificent fireplace.    I can’t imagine a better way to spend a cold winter’s evening.  Plus, if the power were to go out you would still be nice and cozy.  Not that the power in this neighborhood goes out often.  As I understand it though during storms you might lose it for a little while. 

                I do wish the previous owners had taken that painting over the mantle with them.  I swear it feels like the eyes are following me.  I tried to take it down last time, but it is really stuck on the wall.  Once you have it down though this will be such a wonderful room to relax in.  There are some scratches on the floor and a few stains, but a nice buff should take those right out.  Even better, that door leads to a den with inset bookshelves in the walls. 

                Let’s just quickly look through the rest of this floor.  Nothing much to see in the dining room except that candle holding chandelier.  I know the perfect electrician who can replace that with a proper electric lighting fixture.  The kitchen is huge with plenty of storage in the pantry.  There are stairs down to the basement there as well.  It might seem a bit odd that there is a walk-in freezer with a drain in the floor, but I just see that as a one-of-a-kind feature you could only get in a classic house like this one.  Also do you see the size of that oven?  Why you could almost climb in it.  I would not recommend that though as it seems to auto lock when you close it and you can only unlock from outside.

                Of course, there is a guest room and bathroom on this floor as well, but I really think we should head upstairs.  The master bedroom is where the house really shines.  Let’s head up the stairs here to the right.  Not only is this bedroom huge, but it has its own private bathroom with the largest tub I have ever seen indoors.  Those doors lead out to a balcony that looks over the backyard.  For some reason there is a podium built into the rail, but it won’t get in the way of the view if you want to put a garden or something out there.  The previous owner had a lot of parties back there so the grass was trampled fairly badly.  I know a great landscaper if you need one.  I’m sure that five-pointed star made of stones will come up very easily if you want to remove it.  I think it’s a bit of an eyesore personally.  Not even made of decorative stones.

                This is the second bedroom on the floor.  As you can see it has plenty of room.  I’m not sure what they used those hooks on the wall and floor for, but I bet you can have them all out in thirty minutes tops.  The key is how spacious it is with a walk-in closet.  If you want to store some valuables in it this lock is as secure as they come.  I have a buddy that is a locksmith and when I showed him the picture, he said it would take him a full thirty minutes to pick it.  You could even leave the hooks in the closet to secure a safe or something. 

                What’s that?  Oh no you don’t need to see the basement.  Trust me, there are no foundation issues.  Ok if you really must see it follow me.  Trust me you are not going to find a house this size for such a low price anywhere else.  It is a real steal, but the previous owners really have no choice.  See they found themselves in some legal trouble and need the money for their lawyer.   

                Here we go, the basement is right down here.  Ok, calm down.  I know a great cleaning crew that can get all this out.  Now I know it looks like blood, but the police forensics team ran tests.  They don’t know quite was it is, but they have eliminated human and all known mammalian blood.  I have been assured that it can’t be blood because it contains sulfur and still hasn’t dried after weeks of being down here.  It is not toxic though and there is no danger in it being here until cleaned.  It isn’t really that big a deal, is it?                  So, what do you say?  I can get the paperwork all drawn up for an offer in about ten minutes.  Sure, the place might need a bit of clean up, but it’s been here for over one hundred years, and you just don’t get that kind of quality workmanship anymore.  This is a house you can stay in until you die.  Uhm of natural causes many many years from now.  Ready to make an offer?