Fiction Fragment Friday
Last week I did not post a Fiction Fragment Friday. It was a very difficult week personally and I just did not have the energy or the time. It is something I have beaten myself up over a bit, but all we can do when we stumble is to acknowledge it and move on trying to be better. I have creative goals and the only way I will achieve them is if I don’t let setbacks destroy the progress I have made.
I’m not particularly happy with this story and I think it lacks any form of subtlety. It is far from one of my best for these, but it speaks very much to my headspace. It would be nice if the things that hold us back and try to beat us down were external physical things to be fought, but that just isn’t always the case. Sometimes our greatest critics live in our own heads.
I lay there on the couch struggling to get up, but my body had no energy. The blanket wrapped around me felt like I was surrounded by a warm cloud making the world feel somehow unreal. My eyelids fought my commands trying to shut and pull me back into sleep. I thought about all the things that I needed to get done and with each task that crossed my mind it felt like there was a heavier weight on my chest holding me down. The desire to just give in and stay there forever was almost overwhelming.
“Why bother getting up? It’s not like anything you do matters.” I heard the familiar voice, but this time it didn’t seem to just be in my head. It echoed throughout the room with whispers coming from every direction. A warm breath ran across my face and into my ear bringing with it an odor that smelled like something had died and was rotting away.
Shadows ran over me and gathered into a solid figure. It had a dark crimson skin with yellow glowing eyes. Two horns came from the top of it’s head and a pointed tail was flipping around behind it. I couldn’t help but compare the creature to demonic imps I had seen in video games and fantasy art. Opening my mouth to scream I found that I couldn’t make a sound and even worse the pressure on my chest was making it extremely hard to breath. All the while it continued to whisper all of my failures in my ear flicking it’s tongue against my ear.
My body wasn’t moving, but I could feel myself being pulled down like I was sinking into quicksand. I thought back over my life and found myself focusing on the things I had accomplished. I felt overwhelmed, but I also could feel my will gathering. I have always been stubborn and while I might beat myself up I wasn’t about to let someone else do it. “NO.” I gasped out. My right hand shot up and wrapped around the imps throat. My eyes opened wide and I met it’s surprised gaze.
“Noooo.” It hissed at me. “This is not possible. You were mine.”
My left hand joined my right wrapped around it’s throat. I squeezed as hard as I could pulling it off me and to the side. I rolled over on top if the imp and looked it in the eyes. “The things that live in my head are far scarier than you could ever hope to be.” As it stopped struggling the imp faded evaporated into a red cloud that flowed into me. I collapsed on the bed, but I felt stronger somehow.
I curled back into my blanket and slept more soundly than I had in weeks. When I woke up I felt truly rested. Sitting up I looked around for any sign that the demon had been real, but there was nothing. I couldn’t help but wonder if it had all just been a dream. Real or not I felt renewed and went about the rest of my day productively. I found myself staring in the mirror that night ready for bed. Looking at my face my eyes flashed to a yellow glow before turning back to their usual blue.